Trust Can Be a Choice



There are some things in life that we have to earn and there are some things that are given freely.  Where does trust come in? 

In the bible, the original meaning for trust is very similar to the word for 'putting your faith in'.  I've heard people say that, once lost, trust must be earned and I suppose if someone has been untrustworthy and let you down many times, you would have difficulty putting your faith in them again.

Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. Hebrews 11:1

However, when you lose trust or faith in someone, can they really earn it back?  Even when they are not doing anything wrong, you don't trust them.  This does not encourage them to be trustworthy. 

Trust is necessary for loving relationships to flourish and yet it is so easy to lose trust and sometimes it is lost unnecessarily.  Distrust perpetuates itself. The more you don't trust, the more you don't trust.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 1 Corinthians 13:7



Trust is both and emotional and logical act. Emotionally, it is where you expose your vulnerabilities to people, but believing they will not take advantage of your openness. Logically, it is where you have assessed the probabilities of gain and loss, calculating expected utility based on hard performance data, and concluded that the person in question will behave in a predictable manner. In practice, trust is a bit of both. I trust you because I have experienced your trustworthiness and because I have faith in human nature. (Changingminds.org)

Even though the definition from Changingminds.org says that logically we assess whether or not someone will let us down again before we can decide to trust them, I believe that Christians should live a different way especially with those we love.  If love believes all things, shouldn't we choose to trust in our loved ones even after they have let us down? The gift of kindness from the Holy Spirit can give us the ability to trust many times over, kindly giving the benefit of the doubt.

Love, faith, trust, and forgiveness are all tied up together for the Christian.  True love must have faith and trust and since we all make mistakes, there must also be forgiveness.  When someone you love lets you down or does something untrustworthy, instead of holding that against them for an unforeseen future time when you might or might not trust them again, choose kindness and choose to trust them now.  Choose to have faith that it will not happen again.  Choose to love and forgive.

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother who sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not just seven times, but seventy times seven times! Matthew 18:21,22

Please be aware that I am not talking about physical, mental abuse,, infidelity, or something that happens repeatedly over a short period of time, even when they say it won't.  I am talking about a mistake or two or even a few spread over time. If you forgive them, then choose to trust them.

I don't believe we can truly forgive someone and then hold our distrust over their heads. That is not kindness.  Kindness, forgiveness and trust go together.

Jesus, through His Holy Spirit will help us when trust and faith does not come naturally.  These are gifts we need to seek because in our human hearts, trust is difficult but nothing is to difficult for God 

 “Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is anything too hard for me? Jeremiah 32:27



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