A Critical Spirit vs. Instructional Criticism

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. (Ephesians 4:29) Corrupting talk in this verse means words that destroy

Criticism can destroy the hearer and the criticizer. 

There are two ways to be critical of people or situations. I’m sure you’ve heard of constructive criticism which is one way, but the other type of criticism comes from a critical spirit. 


According to the Biblical counseling coalition a critical spirit is a negative attitude of the heart that seeks to condemn, tear down, and destroy with words. A critical spirit is a tool used by Satan and has always been in the world but if you’ve watched any news lately, you know it is becoming stronger. The hatred spewed forth these days is heartbreaking and scary.


The definition of constructive criticism is the process of offering valid and well-reasoned opinions about the work of others, usually involving both positive and negative comments, in a friendly manner rather than an oppositional one. 


This may be the true definition, but I find that people often give constructive criticism that doesn’t come across very friendly. I prefer the term Instructional criticism which might not be any better but what is important (whatever term is used), is that the criticism or opinion has a purpose and is kind. 

Let all that you do be done in love. (1 Corinthians 16:14)

Being criticized is not fun especially when there Is no point to it. When someone says you are not a good writer or speaker or you look fat or skinny, that is just pointless criticism and I believe it comes from a critical spirit. We need to pray against this spirit if we find it in ourselves.


I’ve done it. I’ve said to my husband “are you really going to wear that shirt?  It looks terrible.” And he’s done the same to me.  “boy you sure talked a lot at dinner”  LOL 


The tongue is a small thing, but what enormous damage it can do.  (James 3:5)


Not only do these critical statements have no point to them, they are hurtful, judgmental and do nothing to build a person up.  They are strictly opinion and ---guess what?  That opinion could be wrong!!!


We all have opinions and of course we think our opinions are right or they wouldn’t be our opinions. Depending on how we go about sharing them with others determines if we are critical from a critical spirit or our criticism is instructive.  


In the above example of my husband’s shirt, I could have said, “honey, I really like that shirt but I’m not sure it goes with those pants. What do you think?” and then let him make his own decision.


A little aside here: Some of our criticism, especially of our spouse is because we think what they do and say is a reflection on us.  It is not!  I’m pretty sure people know that I don’t dress my husband. He is not a reflection on me. Young couples especially feel this way and we must get past it. In the case of my husband’s shirt It would probably be better if I didn’t say anything at all (unless he looks like a clown and then, well, you know, we have to say something.) 


When someone criticizes my writing with no instruction, (writers are super sensitive about their writing) it can ruin my whole day. I might not write for weeks thinking I should just give it up. But what if they are wrong? What if something I write or say or do helps one person and I allowed them to stop me? Not good. 


But if someone says to me, “I’m sorry but this is not clear to me. I love this part about such and such, but can you tell me more about the main point?”  Then I will go about rewriting and being thankful that the issue was pointed out to me. 

The ear that listens to life-giving reproof will dwell among the wise. (Proverbs 15:31)

What we hear on the news these days is not instructive criticism or even constructive criticism. The critical spirit, this tool the devil uses to discourage us, make us feel defeated and kills our faith. It is permeating every aspect of society. Children criticize their parents, parents criticize children and everyone criticizes leadership of all types and parties.


We criticize Facebook posts and shares. We criticize laws and how they are enforced or not enforced. We criticize our ministers, churches, worship teams, and others. Why? Does it make us feel better about ourselves?  Can we not control our thoughts and opinions? Do we not think before we speak? 


Christians are supposed to be different from the world. Are we? Or are we so sure that we are right that we must blurt it out to those around us?  

If anyone thinks he is religious and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his heart, this person's religion is worthless (James 1:26)